Well…this has been a long time coming.   I have gotten out of the flow of any regular anything, so it is nice to be able to bring this feature back here again.

*  Congressman Emanuel Cleaver is trying to get next Wednesday declared “Complaint Free Wednesday.” I have a lot of jokes here…but let’s start with his name…CLEAVER? Only a Cleaver (Ward, June, Wally or the Beav himself) would come up with a stupid, utopian idea like this.

*  The Vatican has announced that they are not fans of the newest Twilight film “New Moon” …but “The Men Who Stare at Goats” received four sceptres.

*  J-Lo fell last night during a performance at the American Music Awards. She landed on the one body part she possesses that guaranteed her safety, but it only fueled the talk that she has ass implants after she bounced off the ground and onto her feet without missing a beat.

*  We have an Adam Lambert sighting at last night’s AMAs…Quoting the AP, ” Lambert fondled a dancer, led another around on a leash, had a dancer briefly stick his head in Lambert’s crotch and kissed a man.” I guess he is officially “out” now, huh?

*  The Public Health Agency of Canada has asked that some batches of the H1N1 vaccine stop being distributed because of the odd side effects.  Members of the Canadian Parliament have actually started to grow spines.

In my fifteen years of marriage, I have managed to do remarkable job of staying out of serious trouble.

Generally speaking, things around the this household only become unhinged when I neglect to remember that the four words  “I told you so” are better left unsaid.

Until now.

I have discovered a new method of getting into trouble.

Not having to buy an expensive jewelery for her kind of trouble… (See Kobe Bryant below…)

Not even sleeping on the couch kind of trouble…

It all started last Wednesday when I dropped my wife off at the airport leaving me alone with the children during the beginning of one of the nastiest storms this region has seen in years.

She left me a list for everything.

A list for breakfasts.

A list for home schooling the youngest.

A list for lunches.

A list for home schooling the oldest.

A list for dinners.

A list for things for me to do if I have “extra time.”

A list of acceptable snacks for the kids.

A list of what to feed the turtles, hermit crabs, crickets and frogs.

(BTW…Frogs eat the crickets.)

A list of unacceptable snacks for the kids…and pets.

A list of places I can take the kids to eat…with gift cards attached.

A list of what to use to care for my daughters hair…and the specified order for its’ application.

Before the storm would complete its’ path of destruction and leave 12″ of rain on the ground and blow tidal waters back through the cities storm drainage system, an estimated 75,000 homes were left without power.

My house was one of those 75,000.

We went black on Thursday at about 6:15 pm.

Three seconds after the lights went out, the sounds of a five-year old girl shrieking while she was trapped in a dark room pierced my ears.

I grabbed my flashlight…

As the responsible adult…remember that my wife was gone for the week…I was left to restore order to this chaotic situation.

First on the list was going to be getting some light throughout the house.

Easy.

There are candles EVERYWHERE…kitchen, living room, dining room, home school room, all three bathrooms and every bedroom.   I think we even have candles on the porch.

We have more candles here that at any Michael Jackson vigil…

This was going to be simple…we had enough candles to both light the house and provide enough heat to keep us warm.

Problem solved.

After grabbing one of the long fireplace matches, I started lighting.

Although the five minutes I spent lighting the 30 candles in the house that would bring peace to the house for the three days we were powerless, it would turn out to be an act that I would soon regret.

Due to the remote area my wife was traveling, phone access was limited and we didn’t communicate for the three days the Burgess were living like cave-dwellers…with windows and carpet.

Maybe high-class cave-dwellers.

Jump to Sunday morning…

*ring*

*ring*

ME: Hello.

WIFE: Hey.  It’s me…how’s everything going there?

ME:  You wouldn’t believe it.  That storm that started on Wednesday when you were leaving is still here and we lost power for three days.

WIFE: I’ll bet Haylee was terrified.

ME:  It wasn’t too bad.  It’s a good thing  we had so many candles in the house.

WIFE:  You DIDN’T use all of my expensive Yankee Candles I have out for display only, did you?   I keep candles on the top shelf of the hall closet in case of an emergency.

ME:  Uh… was that on a list?

I am in trouble now for my actions during the storm, but, for those three days, I had the nicest smelling house in Virginia Beach.

Once a week, I get my list of stuff to buy from the wholesale club.  Going on the weekend is a NIGHTMARE and I will go any day during the week to avoid having to deal with the old people who invade the place on Saturday or Sunday.

I can only imagine it is was the entire state of Florida must be like during the summer.

Old people have to be in bed by 8pm, so that is when I go…

This is what was in the email I received today from my wife…

Milk x 2

Bag of D’Anjou pears

Dog Food

Bag of Colby jack shredded cheese

Small tub of grape or cherry tomatoes

Case of little jars of green olives for salad

Fiber One muffins come frozen now…check and see if they have them, or the fresh ones (NO dry mix, though)

English muffins with 8 grams of fiber (Thomas’ Light)

Progresso Light Vegetable Variety or High Fiber soups

Diaper Genie Refill

With all the BRAN on this list, it is a wonder that she isn’t going to need some Depends.

Despite the mass rearrangement of the store a month ago,  I blasted through the aisles and made it to the check out line in five minutes.

I knew the checkout was going to be an issue when I received the list because you can’t go through the self check-out with a 55 pound bag of dog food without having to wait 15 minutes for someone to come and manually ring it up…canceling out the benefit of the self check-out.

When I am out in public, thing are separated in three categories…

1.  Bad.

2.  Worse.

3.  Unbearable.

“Bad” is having to go out in public.

“Worse” is being forced to be within five feet of someone.

“Unbearable” is being forced to talk to someone.

The dog food turned this “worse” situation into an “unbearable” one…

As I walked up to the checkout, I longingly looked over at the self check-out stations knowing something bad was going to happen to me.

I was right.

The first sign was the laughing employee that exclaimed to the rest of the staff, “Hey!  Look!  All we have at the check-outs are rookie cashiers!”

Everyone that wasn’t already in a line gave the cashiers a “once over” to see which line was the best choice.   The shortest line isn’t always the best choice here.   Other customers may have abandoned the cashier with the shortest line because of frustration.

Choosing the right cashier in this situation is one of my skills, but I should have checked out the customers in front of me instead.

I ended up stuck behind a man who didn’t speak English and debated with the cashier, the assistant manager…and the manager about having to pay the tax.   Even with my limited Spanish, I was able to understand everyone enough to know I just needed to be quiet.

It took fifteen minutes to get through the check-out.

Lightnin’!!!!!

I do everything fast.

After another minute, I was at the front door with the guy who checks your reciept…making sure you paid for everything in your card.

He said, “You have an extra milk in your cart.”

“It isn’t extra,” I replied, “I put it there.”

“Well…you didn’t pay for it. Do you want it?”

“That is why I put it in there.”

“Then you are going to have to get back in line and pay for it.”

It was then that I felt my will to live escape my body.

If I wasn’t going to end up back at this store in three days to get more milk, I would have left right then.

If  my wife didn’t judge my trip to the store as either PASS or FAIL…no middle ground…I would have left right then.

So, broken and defeated, I dragged myself back in line to cashier 149 for my $2.39 gallon of 2% milk.

As I made it to the door for the second time, I expected an apology from the guy checking the receipts.  I have seen him many times before and he has always impressed me as polite and an excellent representative of the store.

He did more than apologize as I pushed the cart towards him…

He reached out and put his hand on my back and said, “I am sorry for that…it happens sometimes.”

I just realized that I have a new category…

4.  Homicidal

I have a “No Touching” rule.

I’ll be quick with this post and get it out of the way.

I have been working in a system that I helped create for 14 of the past 15 years.

It worked well because every one had their place…and those who bucked the system…weren’t around for very long.

The group of people who worked together really had formed our own society where the greater good of the collective was most important.   We were all working toward a common goal and we have all moved up the chain of the companies we worked for as a group.

When a company folded because they squandered the millions we made for them, we would regroup and show up somewhere else intact.

I separated from the group in 2004 and that was a tough year.

The transition away from my group was supposed to start last week, but there is no one to handoff to…so I am doing what I was doing for the last four years AND trying to get started with my new duties a the same time.

The feeling is weird because for half of the day I deal with people who are accountable for their actions and take care of their responsibilities and the other half is completely the opposite.

In 2004, I simply put my head down and worked through the mess with 16 hour days at work, four hours of work at home and then to bed for four hours…just to do the same thing each week.

In nine months, I was wasted.  And the group of people came back together in a new place.

I am five years older now.

Five years more experienced.

And, with that, a little smarter.

It is time for me to build my own group.   I may not lead this group of people…if I can recruit someone above me to join me on this quest, then it will be a little easier.  I have always done an excellent job at making those above me shine a little brighter.

That might be what it takes for me not to repeat the mistakes made in 2004.

That was a year that I assumed a new role as a manager of construction projects instead of someone who punched a time card and ran one crew at a time.

Some days, this new position seems to much for me to handle…and I might be right.   I can’t do this thing alone.

There is a sports analogy here…we’ll go with football.

Most quarterbacks are right-handed.   When they drop back to pass, their back is exposed to the rush of the defense for their “blind side.”

The man responsible for protecting the blind side of the quarterback is the Left Tackle.

I am a “Left Tackle” in life.

Every play.

Every day.  Practice or game.

Protect the blind side.

Sure…wide recievers and running backs score the touchdowns, get the glory and the paychecks to match.

But Left Tackles are important too.

Right now, I feel like a quarterback for a bad team…no blindside protection.

After a conversation with my old boss today, I saw, in his eyes, the same troubles that I am experiencing…

We both are quarterbacks without a Left Tackle.

Two small stories that all started within five minutes of each other.

I try to tell the kids that I am the “smartest man alive,” but they don’t really get it…

Today, the other homeschool mother that has been helping me with the kids was going to take the my kids on an excursion to a homeschool group schooling event.

Even though we had spoken on cell phones previously, I made sure she had my cell phone number because…”I am sure nothing bad will happen, but just in case you lock the keys in the van and need me to come and unlock it for you…”

At 7:30 this morning, she took the paper and left with the kids.

At 7:35 am, I went out to my van.   As I was getting in, I looked at the Sentra in front of me and remembered that I needed to get the 12V air pump out of the trunk.   I keep one in each vehicle and noticed that mine was missing when I cleaned it out before I started my new job.

I opened the truck, and there were two of them in there.   I grabbed mine and left.   Mine is unique because I have a compartment in the side that hold a tire plug kit.

A few hours later, as I was driving in a construction area, I heard a clicking from the passenger side front tire.   There is a lot of gravel on these sites and it would  be normal to get a rock stuck in the tread.   I figured that the rock would come out when I got on the highway.

As I hit the on ramp, my phone rang.

It was the woman with my kids.

She locked the keys in the van and needed me to unlock the it for her.

Weird.

WE laughed.

As I got to the locked van I pulled in slowly, I was still hearing the “clicking” noise from my van.

I pulled in and left it running so I could check the tire….having to roll it back twice to get the whole tire exposed.

There it was…

I  1 1/4″ hex head screw.

I was astonished that I had, just this morning, put my plug kit and pump in the van that had just picked up a nail.

I am the smartest man alive.

Since we have been without power since Thursday, I have no idea about the national reporting of the storm that pounded the east coast, but I can say that it started raining early Wednesday morning and it didn’t stop until 8pm on Saturday.

Mixed in the middle of that were winds up to 65 mph.

We camped out in the living room for three days.  And with my wife out of town for a week, we were all forced to fend for ourselves.

My Dewalt powered radio and battery powered police scanner were our entertainment.

I made an attempt at some coffee by heating up some water on the cast iron insert to the stove…it wasn’t until today that I realized the cup I was using…no surprise.

As power was restored this evening, we decided to have a celebration in the form of a feast.

And I solicited some help from a chef-in-training…

My daughter’s plate is on the left.  Notice the lack of broccoli on her plate.  She made me promise that if she helped steam them, that I would make her some corn instead.

Also note the kid’s sparkling wine and dad’s non-sparkling wine.

It was a nice for us to spend this time together, but this evening we are all craving some time to ourselves.

Before the meal, we toasted Thomas Edison.

For our generation, when we look back on veterans, the men and women that served in Vietnam, Korea and World War II are what we think of…nothing against Gulf War Veterans, but it is the time period that I served in both the Army and the Navy Reserves…and I don’t think of myself as a veteran…maybe when I am older.

The image of old men in VFW hats making their way down streets in small town America immediately pops into my head when Veterans Day is mention and rolls around every year.

This day was originally set aside in 1919 to celebrate the ending of World War I, which officially ended on the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month.

I’d like to take this time to thank a group of veterans that has long been forgotten about…those that fought the American War of Independence.

Wars were fought differently then…and for different reasons.

In 1775 a group of colonists rejected to premise that they could be governed without representation and fought to end the tyranny and allegance to a “foreign” government.  They fought and, tens of thousands died for our freedom and the creation of the country we live in today.

As a nation, we have struggled with the changing times and have been slow to correct some mistakes we have made in the 200+ years of existence, but we have done a fairly good job and I can’t think of a better country to call home. 

War is something that each generation has had to endure.  

During that Revoutionary period, one man had to look in the eyes of another before he pulled the trigger.   Today technology has changed the way this happens and maybe a bit of the humanity behind the decisions that are made.

Today, a person can sit in a building in Washington, control a drone that can drop an explosive and end the lives of countless people without looking in their eyes.

This is not to disparage todays soldier, sailor or airmen…today is just different.

I think we all long for the day that wars will not have to fought and the need for soldiers will not exist, but surely not a the cost of anyone having to live under the tyranny of a government that doesn’t represent the people.

We all know that day will not exist.

On this day, we honor those that have died, have served and survived and even those serving today.

I am proud to be a part of that middle group and even more proud of the freedom that each and every soldier, sailor and airman has fought to support, defend and even establish this great nation.

Thank you.

Tomorrow morning I will drop my wife and youngest son off at the airport.  She is off to assist her mother after a very serious health issue she will be recovering from for at least a week.

This leaves me at home with the two oldest children…right in the middle of starting a new job.

We have been able to draw on some very friendly fellow homeschoolers to come and assist when I need to be away from home for work and that is really an added bonus of having some support in town…there  is no family around.

This wasn’t going to be possible with a twenty month old child in the house, so my wife will be taking him for the second time in about a year to Arkansas.   The last time was only four days.  

It is going to be for eight days this time.

The homeschool stuff is already planned out, but I have a “Get out of Jail Free” card that allows me to get dome whatever I can instead of the mountain she has laid out for us to complete…but I will do what I can.

My work is still at a point where I don’t report to anyone…I am kind of out on my own.   A part of what I will do is prepare a brief over each weekend of what I did the week before and what I have going on for the next week…along with my short and long-term plans for the areas.

Hopefully, I can get my hands on some of our consumption data and start crunching some numbers, research some environmental grants and possible tax credits…stuff that requires little human interaction.   I can also put together much of my resident and staff educational programs to get ready to go before the Christmas break.

Running will have to be stopped completely.

I went to the grocery store today and did some meal planning, but I am surely going to haev to come up with some stuff to do outside of the house or the kids will get stir crazy.  There is a minor league hockey game tomorrow night…and I know the kids would love it…but the thought of having to take my daughter to the bathroom might stop that one from happening.

She has her own bathroom issues after the Friendly’s Incident of 2008.

This ought to be a bumpy ride!

I think that it is going to be best for me not to write about work directly on these pages, but this is sure going to be a challenge.

Complaining would be the easy thing to accomplish, but the challenge is going to be changing the atmosphere of failure that the other side of the house has grown accustomed to feeding every day.

The frustration (and the realization) at the situation was immediately evident at the lack of cooperation I received from the simplest of tasks.  Putting off to tomorrow, what could actually be finished today, is a contagious way of thinking…and acting.

A question that could be easily researched and answered in three minutes is passed off to someone, then to someone else…only to have it not answered at all by 80 % of the people at the bottom of the rope.

It was amazing to watch the whole process unfold over one simple item.

No one will answer a question directly…I guess to avoid being cornered  on the accuracy of the answer given.    The question gets passed to the lowest possible level…until it reaches the person who cannot pass it down to anyone else.

Wow.

There is a poison here…and a whole new problem to fix.

This might be the biggest one yet.

Despite being rather busy this week, these two sport stories caught my eye.   It was funny to hear how the two were treated a little differently.  Most of the press and analysts did say that both were wrong, but that the football player was just doing what was done in every football pile.

Take a look for yourself.

Here is some footage from a women’s college soccer game…

And here is another from a Florida college football game…

Obviously, neither of them are good, but I am not sure that just “being a part of the game” is a good enough excuse for for me.   The football player was initially suspended for a half by the team, but HE voluntarily said he would sit out an entire game.   The soccer player was immediately suspended by the college for a yet to be determined period of time.

This doesn’t mean all sports are bad, but that some of the individuals that play these sports can be bad.

Maybe, in a period where it is very easy to lump all people from certain groups together regardless of race, political party, ideology, race and religion, it might be a good idea to realize that there are GOOD and BAD people everywhere.

It wouldn’t be wise to judge an entire group of people on the actions of a select few.